3rd Person POV…

Writing from 3rd person point of view (POV) wasn’t exactly a decision I made when starting to write. But it’s definitely the perspective I write in. 

I actually never knew there were different forms of the third person. That might have been the English class I wasn’t paying attention to, to be entirely honest. The perspective is a part of the story, something about the story that is a part of the ride. 

There are two different types of third-person POV. The first subdivision is the third-person omniscient. For example, I love using Lemony Snicket’s series A Series of Unfortunate Events. Mostly because the narrator creeped me out as a kid. But he was a compelling narrator in the third person omniscient. He had opinions and was not directly involved in the Baudelaire children’s misfortunes but merely recorded them. 

The second one is the third-person limited POV or a closed third. Think Game of Thrones. It allows the insight into one of the characters, usually the protagonist’s head, to show emotions and thoughts. 

My first feedback after drafting several manuscripts of the Klytië was that I switched perspectives without clearly indicating a switch to the reader. Essentially I did a lot of head-hopping. A common mistake with writing in the third person. As an example, see below:

They nodded and left. Andrea shot her a worried glance as she left. Klytië wasn’t too terribly worried the Thirteen would most likely have orders to bring her back safely. She waited for Devan to speak. 

Devan leaned forward; he made sure he had her complete attention and waited. He might have orders to bring her back alive, but that didn’t mean he had to treat her with respect. She was their prisoner, and that was something she would understand. She had hurt hundreds and was causing too much trouble. She was going to find justice in Azurite.

Also, that’s the rough, unedited version, so not pretty. But it’s an excellent short example of head-hopping. For me, it seems to happen the most at the beginning and end of scenes. 

Let’s walk through how the scene could be better written to stay in the third person. 

First, I needed to identify whose perspective I wanted this part of the story to be from. I liked this scene from Klytië’s perspective, but I wanted to set up Devan’s distrust of her. I think in my mind, I was trying to write in the omniscient 3rd person POV without understanding that the omniscient 3rd person is an outside narrator. So if I wrote the scene from that perspective, it would go like this:

The princess, Andrea, didn’t hide her worry well as she left Klytië alone with Devan. Her stubborn friend always gave her too much trouble, but Klytië’s stubbornness exceeded the average person’s expectations. Although both were about to discover, Devan wouldn’t have the patience to put up with their usual antics. Andrea might be well known for her kindness and help to those in need but underneath the polite exterior burned a fire of passion. 

Even that isn’t necessarily a great 3rd person omniscient POV, but it is challenging to do well. However, I think it illustrates the point. But it doesn’t allow me to set up the scene in the way I wanted. 

So that leaves 3rd Person limited POV. The story is told from inside one person’s head with no head-hopping unless it’s clear and distinct. So instead, it would look something like this:

“We will let you know when we decide to leave,” answered Devan, “Your majesties, might I speak to her alone?” It wasn’t a request; Devan clearly expected them to listen. They nodded and left. Andrea shot her a worried glance. Klytië wasn’t too terribly worried the Thirteen would most likely have orders to bring her back safely. She waited for Devan to speak. Klytië kept her face blank as he leaned forward. 

“Let’s be clear.” Devan started his tone authoritative as he kept eye contact, “The royal family of Pyrite may be less inclined to enforce the laws. When we arrive in Azurite, you will be put on trial and held accountable for your actions.”

It’s cleaner, better, not perfect, but better. Instead of switching into Devan’s head, I focus on his actions highlighting his distrust of her. 

Okay, that was a lot, but I hope it helps understand the differences between the types of third-person POV. I’m an examples kind of person, so that helps me. However, below are sources if you like a more classical approach.

Limited vs. Omniscient: How to Choose Your Point of View by John Matthew Fox Book Fox

Third Person Omniscient Narration Examples and Definition by Master Class